Chooks

Enter the Supaseeder

This, is not just any drill.  This is a Vicon Supaseeder LZ401.And that is Dad obediently drilling grass seed, shortly before I banned him from attending Harvest Festival - you must have something to harvest in the coming year before you give thanks for the present.  Farming with your children is fun.

Farmer Humph got his own back as his helpers enjoyed a Sunday afternoon trot behind the tractor, brandishing hoes to unblock the drill coulters (left) as they encountered trash on the headland.

And so today, I'm giving you the opportunity to live the dream...the wind in your hair, a hoe clutched tightly in your hand...feel the rush in 14 seconds of incredible agricultural footage...

Before the chickens ruin everything...

LDF Mini Eggs

Easter is a very exciting time at Lower Dairy Farm.  The cows cannot help but get into the spirit of Easter, Humbug's joined in trying to eat the Easter decorations in the house and I seem to be rewarding myself with one Cadbury's Easter Egg for every word of my thesis I write.

But that's okay because Dolly our special (full-size, not bantam) Easter chick has started laying again, doing her bit to keep you supplied with eggs.

Well, trying at least.  Introducing LDF's very own miniature, yolk-free eggs...Mini Eggs if you will.

Happy Easter!

Roll up, roll up!

For the past week the valley has roared with tractors rushing to cultivate, drill and do whatever it takes to keep some moisture in the soil. To celebrate the end of drilling and another week of arrivals (not forgetting my updated list of future calvings in, get this, date order), it's time to feed those tired, hungry farmers!

Today, we're honouring our very own Easter chicks with a family favourite,  Cheesy Yorkshire.

Forget toad-in-the-hole, this is far superior!   And don't worry Marmite-haters, you cannot taste it (trust me), so unless you are allergic to or have a genuine phobia of Marmite, you are not allowed to leave it out.  No excuses!

Cheesy Yorkshire

6oz plain flour, 3 of Lower Dairy Farm's finest eggs*, ~1/4 - 1/2pt milk, 1 onion - diced, 2 tsps chopped sage (mixed herbs if easier), 1/2 tbsp Marmite, cubed cheese - Cheddar is best (British of course)

Dice the onion and brown in a little oil in a cake or roasting pan/ovenproof dish.  Make the batter as for a Yorkshire pudding - combine eggs, flour, milk and beat until the batter "whoops".  Beat in the herbs and Marmite.  Sprinkle cubes of cheddar over the onion and pour over the batter.

Cook at 220oC (G.M.7) until well-risen, cracked and golden.  Don't panic if it doesn't rise or falls flat, some (me) say the denser version is the best!

Delicious hot or cold (excellent picnic food) and particularly good for breakfast - if it lasts that long!

WARNING: Batter may have mesmeric qualities.  People have been found staring at batter - or cooking it with the power of their mind?

 

* Multiply quantities up or down with 1 egg for every 2oz flour.

The Chicken and the Pig

Happy New Year!
 Firstly, a belated thank you to the Stoke-by-Nayland Middle School Eco Club for collecting apples for two very happy pigs. Our second delivery arrived today and as you can see, they are enjoying them greatly!

Here's hoping the apples distract them from breaking into their Eldorado, the hen run - clearly not that desirous of freedom.  The heavy rain made this far removed from a city of gold and the hens have been whisked away in a professional manner (walked along the road) to higher ground and a deluxe new pen.

And GREAT news!  We've got a new worker on the farm, pictured here during his JCB training.

Lesson 2: It's all about visibility
 Such skills!  Totally makes up for the slightly bizarre Christmas present of Jesus, the baby muntjac, who joined the Lower Dairy Farm nativity courtesy of this talented hound.  Surprise!

Who's your daddy?

A week of birth.  Three calves...two as yet unnamed:

 

 

                                                                                                                                      And the third, introducing "Jean", sired by Kiss frontman Gene Simmons...

Uncanny.

But that wasn't all...

Yep, those weird slimy things turned into bundles of fluff.  All together now...awwww.  It is incredible that something so small can spray food 4ft up a wall.  Less cute.

For now, there is a baby embargo on the farm.  No more!!  I've started stumbling around the farm clutching my giant Starbucks mug, hallucinating that they've opened a branch on the farm.  Seriously, I've planned the layout in my sleep. I'm just waiting for the phonecall...we could totally get Gene Simmons to open it!

Previously on Lower Dairy Farm...

...harvest, piglets, puppies and poultry.

Yep, harvest is done (bar that unintentional "conservation area" at the top that needs baling). So here's a quick recap of what's been going on...

Between the rainy days, we completed our harvest and Dad's baling marathon means we've got enough fodder for the winter. This year saw Lower Dairy Farm's first Bale Census - a hi-tech compilation method involving a post-it note on the fridge.

Hundreds of bales = lots of bale hauling from around the village. It's my first year hauling bales on the road (thank you patient drivers, shame on you impatient idiots) and I enlisted the help of Lower Dairy Farm's newest member, Humbug the dog on his first tractor adventure. I like to haul bales in style, as you can see from the picture below.

 

 

 

 

It's safety first on the farm, and when tying bales on it really helps to use all your weight and I like to harness the power of the dog pulling on the end of the rope...provided Humbug the highly trained puppy gives the rope back... Tying on provides great amusement for those watching, particularly on a windy day when flinging the rope accurately over a loaded trailer is nigh on impossible. Apparently it's "really funny" to watch when the rope flies back over and hits you in the face before the dog runs off with it. I really have no future as a team roper, but for now, I'll blame the driving wind. Turn the trailer round? What a waste of fuel.

Anyhow, with all bales back at HQ and counted, it's time to get stuck into everyday chores. The cows are out on pasture, and we're about to head into our next block of calvings. This will coincide with (fingers crossed) duckling hatching - far less stressful than calving!

August saw the first pigs on the farm for over 50 years. Dad has a faint memory of Grandad keeping pigs in the same place we are today. Our two are Gloucester Old Spot x Tamworth, so should make for good pork and bacon.

What with the piglets, calves and puppy arriving within one month, we've had lots of visitors. I am now positive that the pigs have a better diet than I do as the people of Nayland and Little Horkesley bring them surplus veg from their gardens. It really does take a village, and you know you've reached a new low when you consider rescuing a cabbage from a pig pen.

This week has been particularly insane, finishing harvest, hauling, chicken windproofing (the excitement knows no bounds), sorting the house out etc, the puppy (I'm not reknowned for my enthusiasm and boy does he require a lot), selling a ton of books through Amazon, being pimped out at the farm gate (yep, I would make a good Bathsheba, stop encouraging the men over 60 Dad) and an unkept promise that I would actually get round to weighing the pigs - piglet catching requires fast acceleration, great hand-eye co-ordination and the ability to think fast...none of which I am blessed with! Oh and the PhD - yesterday was the first night I've had a chance to look at anything properly for a month. So of course, I am simultaneously searching for books on pig husbandry, setting up the blog and researching poultry drinkers online. It's quite a search history!